Monday, June 30, 2014

June reading notes: culture, race & identity




















In June, I read three newer novels - all published in the first half of this year.  I had read reviews of all of the books, and their descriptions were intriguing.  But none of the three novels knocked my socks off.  I am glad I read them, however, particularly the first two (pictured above), which both deal with identity, culture, and race. 

Pioneer Girl by Bich Minh Nguyen is described as a novel about a Vietnamese American family's ties to The Little House on the Prairie.  I enjoyed this book from the standpoint of getting a peek into the experiences of a Vietnamese family.  The protagonist, Lee Lien, and her brother are first generation Americans.  The contrast between them and their mother and grandfather, who emigrated from Vietnam, was well portrayed.  Unfortunately, Lee and her brother aren't very likeable or sympathetic characters.  They faced a lot of challenges, because their father died when they were children and their mother was very harsh and judgmental.  The mother and grandfather characters could have been more developed, and I'd like to have known a bit more about them.  I enjoyed the back story about Laura Ingalls Wilder and Rose Wilder, some of it historical fact or conjecture and some of it fiction.  This is a novel, after all, even though it reads a lot like a memoir.  Sometimes the intertwining and overlapping of Lee's research into her family's connection with Rose Wilder, and then her own family drama with her brother, mother and grandfather seemed forced.  I was hoping the protagonist would go through more of a transformation, I guess.  I would recommend this book to readers who have a significant interest in The Little House on the Prairie books, but I'm not sure it would have more general appeal.  I'd like to read some of Nguyen's other books, especially her memoir Stealing Buddha's Dinner.

Boy, Snow, Bird by Helen Oyeyemi, is set in a small town in Massachusetts in 1953.  The main character, named Boy Novak, is a young woman escaping an abusive father in New York City.  The book has been described as a retelling of Snow White, but it doesn't much parallel that traditional tale.  In her new town - Boy finds friends and a suitor, Arturo, whom she eventually marries.  The Snow White angle comes in because Boy has issues with mirrors and understanding her identity.  But mostly, the reference is to the fact that Boy becomes stepmother to her husband's mysterious and beautiful young daughter, Snow.  When Boy becomes pregnant, her daughter Bird is born with dark skin.  This lets out the secret that Arturo's family are light-skinned African Americans who have been passing as white.  The rest of the novel explores the relationships of the various characters with each other in the aftermath of this revelation.  It's a fascinating premise.  The writer's style and her storytelling, however, are not straight forward.  There are hints at magical realism, too.  Some of the characters, particularly Arturo's family members and even Snow, were not as fully developed as I would have liked.  There is a plot twist toward the end that just didn't fit, at least for me.  I understand that it connected with the book's theme of identity, but it seemed sort of "added on" and didn't flow from what preceded it.  Still, I would definitely recommend this book to anyone interested reading about race and identity. 

Both of these books were written by authors who are portraying experiences first hand.  As a child, Bich Minh Nguyen immigrated to the U.S. with her family.  Helen Oyeyemi was born in Nigeria and raised in London. She is a person of color, writing about racial identity.  Each author's experiences give them insight into culture, race and identity that is specific to the themes in their novels.  I am somewhat discouraged by the wild popularity of the sort of novels written by white female authors that deal with race in a superficial or secondhand way.  Those books may have merit, but I would like to see more readers move beyond such popular titles to read books by authors of color and authors from cultures other than their own.  As a side note, I really love the cover art and the titles of both of these books.  I wonder how much the appeal of the cover art and titles contributed to my adding the books to my reading list.

The third novel that I read in June was The Blessings by Elise Juska.  I chose this book because it was described as a book that explored the complexities, sorrows and joys of family.  The various blurbs made it sound like it would be a fairly uplifting book.  After having read the previous two books, I was looking for something lighter.  The Blessings was lighter, I would say, but not heart-warming which I guess is what I was really hoping for.   



An additional reading note:  I actually read Where the Mountain Meets the Moon by Grace Lin back in May for mother-daughter book club.  This is a children's novel and a 2010 Newberry Honor book.  But since I've been writing on the themes of culture and identity, I'll add this to the mix.  With fantasy and folk tale elements, an epic journey, a redeeming family story, and a lot of wisdom mixed in, I was touched more by this children's novel than by any of the adult novels above.  Certainly those novels had other qualities that made them worthwhile to read (particularly Boy, Snow, Bird).  Still, I highly recommend this gem of a novel by Grace Lin.  I hope to read its companion novel Starry River of the Sky very soon.





P.S.  Currently I'm reading:

The Path to Purpose: How Young People Find their Calling in Life by William Damon
The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin
   

Sunday, June 29, 2014

The place where I live, redux


My daughter dives into the pool at the Schultz Aquatic Center at Lincoln Park.
Last year, I wrote an essay - The Place Where You Live - Milwaukee, Wisconsin, which appears online and was also published in the January-February 2014 issue of Orion Magazine.  Written in September of 2013, the essay is a "deep appreciation" of my neighborhood, specifically the little few blocks area where my family lives.  It's no coincidence that I wrote those words in September, in the afterglow of summer and on the cusp of autumn.  The essay highlights the natural beauty and the sense of pride and community within my neighborhood, without sugarcoating the challenges that exist in most urban places.

I thought about that essay quite a bit this weekend because I felt fortunate to experience so many of the wonderful things that my neighborhood and my city have to offer.  It is true that summer tends to bring an increase in crime, with more people out and about.  And it's not hard to find stories of shootings or muggings or break-ins, on the evening news, in the local newspaper or on Facebook.  While I want to be informed and aware of crime in the area, I also want to keep that in perspective and to remember all the good things about living where I do.  My family and I spent the weekend enjoying many of the amazing things our city has to offer.

As I wrote about yesterday, I spent the morning and early afternoon biking and lunching with friends.  I can bike from my house to the lakefront, along the beautiful Oak Leaf Trail and past the Urban Ecology Center (another great asset to our city), and arrive at the Milwaukee Art Museum within 20 minutes.  Yesterday, our group biked from there through Lakeshore State Park past Discovery World and Summerfest, crossed through the vibrant and historic Third Ward neighborhood, passed the Harley Davidson Museum, and connected with the Hank Aaron State Trail.  The Hank Aaron State Trail runs along the Menomonee River, and - besides being a beautiful trail - connects with many other sights and destinations, including another branch of the Urban Ecology Center and Miller Park.  We biked as far as the Pettit Center yesterday.  On our way back downtown, we stopped along the river at The Twisted Fisherman and lunched outside on the deck.  We have lots of great restaurants in our city, too.  

Milwaukee is such an accessible city with so much to offer.  At the same time that I was having my biking adventure, one of my sons was taking the city bus in the opposite direction, north of the city to the Bayshore Town Center, where he could enjoy bowling and a movie with friends.  From where we live, it's easy to get around the city and nearby suburbs using the county transit system.  Meanwhile our older son was working as a lifeguard at a local county pool.  The Milwaukee County Parks system has several great pools, many beautiful parks and a huge variety of facilities and recreational opportunities.  Also - beer gardens.  Speaking of parks and pools, we visited the Schultz Aquatic Center at Lincoln Park this afternoon.  After an afternoon at the pool, I enjoyed dinner at cafe corazon with friends.  Two of us walked there, and another friend biked.  After margaritas and dinner, I walked home and sat down contentedly to write this blog.         

It's worth repeating - I appreciate the place where I live!

Saturday, June 28, 2014

A beautiful day

Summer is my favorite season.  I like being outside when it's sunny and warm, and so I spend more time outdoors and get more "nature therapy" this time of year.  In recent years, there's been an explosion of research and literature on the benefits of spending time in nature.  For my part, I know that I am definitely a happier and healthier person when I am able to get outside and enjoy time in nature - even if it's just my backyard garden or the local park.   

It is possible to get outdoors in other seasons, and I appreciate living in a part of the world that has distinct seasons.  Fall is probably my second favorite season with all its showy color changes and falling leaves.  I appreciate its flair for the dramatic.  And I would like spring, if it actually showed up.  Usually winter lags on and reduces spring to a few weeks, rather than a few months.  I admire people who get outdoors consistently in all seasons.  There's that oft-quoted Scandinavian saying, which I've heard phrased various ways, but basically says "no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes."  My problem is that I just don't like being cold.  Also, I don't have and don't want to acquire or wear all the special clothing needed to stay warm when it's cold outside.  As I've said before, I'm a minimalist.  In the summer, you can go outside with little effort related to wardrobe and equipment.  Just don't forget the sunscreen.  After a long and hard winter here in Wisconsin, we've had an iffy summer so far with lots of rain, cooler temperatures, and a fair amount of fog.  Today, though, was a perfect summer day.

All of this is just a really long-winded way of saying - I thoroughly enjoyed this summer day.  I biked and enjoyed a good dose of nature with five friends.  Warmth & sunshine, biking with conversation & laughter, friends and food.  A beautiful day!

Friday, June 27, 2014

A blog about nothing (and anything)


some notes in my commonplace book

If you watched the television show Seinfeld, you might remember the episode where Jerry and George were pitching a sitcom idea to NBC executives.  George comes up with the idea of "a show about nothing."  I thought of that when I was planning my blog, because I wasn't sure if it should have a specific theme or focus.  Would it be a "blog about nothing"?  

I've been hooked on a variety of blog genres myself - mostly family/parenting, homeschool/education and frugal/money-saving blogs.  There are so many categories of blogs - fitness and health, religion, politics, news, history, travel, etc.  Apparently, there is also a category called lifestyle blogs.  I wasn't sure what that means, but it sounded a bit too fancy and domestic for me.  When I googled the term, I found an article "Better Homes and Bloggers" that appeared in bitch magazine in 2012.  The article's tagline reads "Are lifestyle blogs a new way for women to compare themselves and come up short?"  That sounds pretty sucky.  The article defines lifestyle blogs as those "which focus largely on traditionally feminine topics such as fashion, home decor, crafts, food, and family."  I think I've seen some of these blogs...like the mom with five or six kids who runs a hobby farm and sells fresh eggs, homeschools, crafts excessively and writes books about it, cooks perfectly healthy and well-balanced meals every day, sews all her family's clothing, and concocts all their personal, healthcare and cleaning formulas from scratch.  I'm only exaggerating a little.  As it turns out - I'm not much interested in fashion or home decor, but I do like crafts and gardening.  Together with my husband, I am involved in all the basic stuff that's involved in running a household - cooking, baking, cleaning, decorating, shopping, repairing, etc.  But these are not necessarily the things I want to write about.  Also, I'm a minimalist.  And not a foodie at all.  We keep things really simple around here.     

When I think about what I do like to write about, there are some general themes:  family life; education and lifelong learning; nature; writing, journaling and other types of creative expression; books and reading; my neighborhood and city.  I like to tell stories and to inject some humor when I can.  A healthy dose of self-deprecation keeps me grounded.  If you read my first post, you know that I procrastinated in deciding on a blog address.  I also fretted over the blog name, since my blog isn't meant to fill any particular niche or attract any particular readership.  I decided on "commonplace" because I had started keeping a commonplace book - a notebook where I write favorite quotes, and passages or notes from books I'm reading.  People have been keeping commonplace books since at least the Middle Ages.   

According to Wikipedia:
Commonplace books (or commonplaces) were a way to compile knowledge, usually by writing information into books.  Such books were essentially scrapbooks filled with items of every kind: medical recipes, quotes, letters, poems, tables of weights and measures, proverbs, prayers, legal formulas. Commonplaces were used by readers, writers, students, and scholars as an aid for remembering useful concepts or facts they had learned. Each commonplace book was unique to its creator's particular interests.
Of  course, there's also the meaning of "commonplace" as something not new or unusual, something that happens commonly.  And indeed much of what we experience in life is commonplace, the regular day-to-day stuff that happens as we go about our lives.  So I might use my blog as a sort of electronic commonplace book, and I might also use it as a place to write about commonplace, day-to-day things and experiences.  As far as "curious" goes, I can work that word's two meanings as well.  There are many things I'm curious about and want to learn more about.  These are often the topics I read and write about.  But, there's also "curious," as in strange and unusual.  I find it fairly curious, in that sense, that there is a word to describe mishearing lyrics or spoken words.  And that's why I wrote about "mondegreen" yesterday. 

A blog about nothing?  Rather a blog about anything that's commonplace or curious!  

Thursday, June 26, 2014

"A Greek Calliope" & other misheard song lyrics

This is Calliope, the Muse of Epic Poetry in Greek mythology.

This is Katy Perry, who does not sing about Calliope.




I like to sing.  Loudly, and mostly in the privacy of my house or car.  Since I spend a lot of time chauffeuring kids around in my minivan, I do much of my singing while driving.  For singing aloud, I don't claim any sort of refined taste in music.  Catchy tunes are best.

Speaking of catchy tunes, I really like the Katy Perry song "Roar."  It's a motivating and empowering sort of pop anthem.  I sing it loudly whenever it comes on the radio.  This is surprising, I know, but my teenage sons do not pay attention to me when I sing loudly in the car.  They tune me out as best they can and may even pretend I'm not there.  Ear buds are sometimes deployed.  But my daughter, who is eleven, often sings along with me.  At the very least, she pays attention to what I'm singing.  So, several weeks ago, when we were running errands, "Roar" was playing on the radio.  I'm belting out - "So I sat quietly, a Greek Calliope..."  





I'd been singing that exact lyric for months.  But on this occasion, my daughter says, "Um, mom, I don't think that's what she's saying."  And at that moment, I knew that Katy Perry probably would not be singing about Calliope.  A bit too erudite, I think.  Also, it doesn't make any sense.  In Greek mythology, Calliope is the muse of epic poetry.   She's said to be Homer's muse for the Iliad and the Odyssey.  It wouldn't make sense to refer to Calliope - a muse, an inspiration for Homer's epics - in the same line as "so I sat quietly."  But I did so love singing it that way!  And Katy Perry isn't my only victim.  At one point, I thought the chorus/title to the popular Taylor Swift song "Twenty Two" was "Swimsuit." Which doesn't make sense at all.  But I guess I didn't think about it too much.  I mostly focus on the part "dress up like hipsters," because I live in a neighborhood that actually has a lot of hipsters in it.  Although, I don't dress up like them.   
I don't always take song lyrics so lightly.  There are songs that have special meaning to me, and music whose words inspire me.  But when it comes to catchy tunes, my desire to sing is apparently much stronger than my interest in accurately understanding the words.  Sometimes, I don't even really try to understand the lyrics.  "Every Rose Has a Thorn" by Poison was on the radio the other day.  I was singing along, and my daughter asked me, "What's he saying?"  My response: "I'm not sure.  I just kind of make it up.  You know - Greek Calliope."  "Greek Calliope" has become my code word for "just making stuff up."    
I discovered, just today, that there is actually a word for this sort of mishearing.  It's called "mondegreen."  Mondegreen, according to Merriam Webster, is "a word or phrase that results from a mishearing of something said or sung."  The word's origin comes from the mishearing in a Scottish ballad of laid him on the green as Lady Mondegreen.”  I really do learn something new every day, whether it's the precise lyrics to a song or the word to describe mishearing them! 
*****
What song lyrics have you misheard?

Katy Perry’s Lyrics
Mary’s version
I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely
I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, a Greek Calliope

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Why write?



a collection of "morning pages" notebooks & gratitude journals

Facing the blank page can be hard.  It was hard when I wrote an excruciatingly boring PowerPoint presentation about zoonotic diseases.  It was hard when I wrote the heartbreakingly-painful-to-compose eulogy for my dad's funeral.  Yet the power of the written word is so strong – to inform, to tell a story, to entertain, to commiserate or comfort, to express every idea and every emotion.

I have appreciated the written word, and have been a writer, since childhood.  My “official” first publication was The Neighborhood News, written by me, my sister, and – if I remember correctly – a few other neighborhood kids.  It was tapped out on our family’s typewriter and then photocopied by my dad at work.  I’m not sure what breaking news it contained or how widely it was distributed, and I think there was only one issue.  I don’t remember any particular writing assignments from elementary school, but I dabbled in poetry on my own.  There was a rhyming poem about the drudgery of the paper route.  The first lines were:  “The paper route, please don’t pout.  I know you’re sad, this task is bad.”  Or something like that.  (We sure loved our paper routes!)  In high school, I took upper level English courses and worked on the school newspaper.  In college I studied journalism, but I never worked as a journalist. Most of my jobs have required a good bit of writing, and I kept journals and wrote stories, essays and poems sporadically. 

As a young adult, I read the book The Artist’s Way: a Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron.  The author recommends a practice called morning pages.  Her description of the process:  “Put simply, the morning pages are three pages of longhand writing, strictly stream-of-consciousness…”  I have written morning pages on and off over the years.  My three pages are largely stream-of-consciousness as recommended – recapping events both mundane and exciting, telling stories, complaining, venting, praising, thanking, dumping my brain in whatever way is necessary.  Morning pages are basically writing as therapy.  Full of darkness as well as light, these pages are not meant to be shared or read by others.  My notebooks full of morning pages have been reread or not, pulled apart, shredded or recycled.  Writing morning pages makes me feel better.  Actually, writing in general makes me feel better.  I love the way author Lori Pickert describes this sentiment in one of her blog posts“Writing makes me feel happier and less likely to stab someone with a fork, so I’m going to try to do it a little more often.”  I really don't want to stab anyone with a fork or resort to aggression of any kind.  Writing will do.

Another writing practice that keeps me sane and gives me perspective is keeping a gratitude journal.  For the past couple of years, I've tried to remember to open my journal a few times a week and write about the things for which I am thankful.  It has become as important to me as other things I do to stay healthy, like exercise and getting enough sleep.  I have also tried art journaling.  I haven't done a whole lot of it, but I did work through some of the exercises in The Art Journal Workshop:  Break Through, Explore, and Make it Your Own by Traci Bunkers.  Art journaling combines writing with other forms of creative expression - drawings, painting techniques, photos, memorabilia, collage, etc.  Art journaling feels like a gift to myself.  But I really enjoy writing things as gifts for others.

I write silly list poems in handmade cards for my kids' birthdays.  For my sister’s fiftieth birthday, my other sister and I compiled a list of fifty things about her.  I wrote those fifty things into a handmade accordion fold book that was decorated with doodles and photos.  At my parent’s fiftieth wedding anniversary party, I delivered a speech I had written - with my siblings' input - to honor our parents.  It feels good to create and give those personalized gifts of writing.  On the other hand, the most difficult things I've ever written were my dad’s obituary and the eulogy for his funeral.  Together with my mom and siblings, we shared thoughts and ideas.  It was so important, no matter how difficult, to put those thoughts and ideas into the right words as a tribute to the great father, husband and man that he was.  But those words were a gift to me too, and I like to think they were a gift to all of us who loved my dad. 

Each story, essay, article, poem or letter written has the potential to be a gift.  Writing as a gift is expressed eloquently in this quote by young adult author John Green: 

Every single day, I get emails from aspiring writers asking my advice about how to become a writer, and here is the only advice I can give:  Don’t make stuff because you want to make money – it will never make you enough money.  And don’t make stuff because you want to get famous – because you will never feel famous enough.  Make gifts for people – and work hard on making those gifts in the hope that those people will notice and like the gifts.
Maybe they will notice how hard you worked, and maybe they won’t – and if they don’t notice, I know it’s frustrating.  But, ultimately, that doesn’t change anything – because your responsibility is not to the people you’re making the gift for, but to the gift itself.

*****

I think that's really beautiful.  And I hope that the essays that I have written - about parenting or homeschooling or my neighborhood - have been gifts also to those who have read them.  I know that the many, many words I have read over the years - novels and other books, articles and essays and poems, letters and notes from family and friends - all of those words have been gifts to me and shaped my life tremendously.  Here's to the written word!  

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Haircut Haiku


before
after

Today ended up being a lot busier than I thought, but all for good and fun reasons.  However - I didn't finish the essay I planned, so I'm sharing this silly haiku that I wrote over four weeks ago when I got my haircut.  It seemed like a dramatic change at the time, but I'm used to it now.

*****

Haircut Haiku

Was so tired Friday
Sat down and said "shoulder length"
It's much shorter, no?

Monday, June 23, 2014

Accountability




I noticed this view early one morning, after my run, while lying on the grass doing crunches in my yard.  Although I do love the look of the green tree tops against the blue sky, I do not get up at 5:30 a.m. three times a week to enjoy the view.  And I don’t get up and exercise because I’m super motivated or enthusiastic about exercise either.  But I have exercised regularly for over two years now, because I have accountability built into my exercise routine.  Accountability in this case is my friend and exercise partner Mary Ellen.  Exercise is good for me, and I’m always glad I’ve done it.  But I’m not convinced that would be quite enough to keep me on track.  If Mary Ellen wasn’t meeting me in the morning, I’m pretty sure I’d turn off the alarm and go back to bed many mornings.  We motivate each other to get out there, and we also motivate each other to keep going.  Plus there’s the bonus of visiting with a friend, and the distraction of conversation to keep our minds off the effort needed to continue and finish.     

There are lots of reasons people - like me - don’t exercise or do other things they say they want to do.  I highly recommend the book The Willpower Instinct:  how self-control works, why it matters and what you can do to get more of it by Kelly McGonigal, PhD., for an in depth look at the psychology behind willpower.  One chapter in the book describes how we make excuses or use mental tricks to convince ourselves that we will start on goals, or quit bad habits, at some point in the future.  We will eat better, exercise, meditate, write, paint, organize, declutter, or whatever it may be - but we'll do it tomorrow or later, not today.  

I don’t use excuses or tricks to put off exercising, because I have accountability with that.  But I do use rationalizations and mental tricks in other areas.  I justify not working on an essay or blog post because I cleaned the house, or chauffeured kids all day, or in some way was too busy.  I’m too busy or too tired, and so I deserve a “reward” –reading or watching or clicking around the Internet.  Meanwhile I’m putting off the things that I claim are most important to me.  I know from experience that it helps if I have a deadline, or someone who’s counting on me for an article.  I can’t keep revising and editing (“perfecting”) if someone’s waiting.  Just like I can’t turn off my alarm and go back to sleep when Mary Ellen is waiting for me to go running.  

Thomas Edison said, "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work."  First and foremost, writing is about doing the work.  You can't just talk about writing; you have to actually write.  Regularly.  At times, I've been very committed to writing regularly.  Other times, not so much.  Starting with this post today, my writing accountability challenge for myself is to post every day for thirty days.  It may be anything from a haiku to an essay, but I will write a post each day for thirty days.  Okay - go!