how does your garden grow?

Mary, Mary, quite contrary
how does your garden grow?

this summer...

my garden is full
of pauses and silences,
breathing deep,
absorbing sunshine and warmth,
renewing.

my garden is full
of so many words,
read,
pondered,
savored.

my garden is full
of tired muscles
happily exerted in
walking,
biking,
running.

my garden is full
of cherished friends.
talking,
sharing,
laughing.

my interior garden
is beautiful,
renewed.

outside...

the garden was
left to fend
for itself;
completely untended
by human hands.

two tomato plants
thrive, sprouted
from the remains
of last year's tomatoes,
that sank into the ground,
wintered there,
and rose again.

morning glory
spreads its showy
pink and purple
flowers everywhere
intertwined with
overgrown oregano,
multitudes of milkweed,
clusters of clover.

my outside garden
was let go, and it too
is beautiful.

*****

I enjoy gardening and usually plant a vegetable garden in the area pictured below. After a stressful school year, I wanted to focus my energy elsewhere this summer.  I decided to let the garden go.  Left completely to itself, the garden produced two tomato plants and a sunflower, in addition to its usual summer residents - morning glory, milkweed, oregano, dill.  It's not only beautiful in its untended wildness, but also a haven for bees, butterflies, and other creatures too.

Sometimes we have to give ourselves permission to let things go.  When we let go, beautiful things can happen, in more ways than one.

Read diverse books.

i love this book, and isn't the cover beautiful?

I recently read the novel Ayesha at Last by Uzma Jalaluddin, which is described on the book jacket as "a modern-day Muslim Pride and Prejudice for a new generation of love."  As mentioned in my latest reading notes post, I've read a few Pride and Prejudice "retellings" lately.  Ayesha at Last is my favorite of these by far.  The book has received a number of starred reviews (Publishers Weekly, Booklist, Library Journal and Kirkus) and has landed on many summer reading lists.  It's a well-written and engaging story with a fascinating cast of characters.  I couldn't put it down!  The book is set in a "close-knit Toronto Muslim community" and gives us insight into that community and its culture, customs and traditions while also exploring universal themes about family and love.  I highly recommend this novel to anyone interested in a fun "dramedy."   You don't have to be familiar with Jane Austen or P & P to enjoy Ayesha at Last.  Check it out!

*****

I've written previously about my commitment to read books by diverse authors.  When I talk about reading diverse books, I specifically mean books not only about but also written by people with different racial, ethnic and/or cultural backgrounds and perspectives than my own.  (Therefore a book like The Help by Kathryn Stockett, which I found on a diverse reading list on Goodreads, is NOT a diverse book.  That book makes me cringe, by the way.)  If you'd like to read more about my commitment to read diversely, you can check out these posts: A challenge for Black History Month and January reading notes - got privilege?  Reading notes here and here also reference diverse books.

When I google "read diverse books," most of the results are articles directed toward teachers and parents and are recommendations of diverse books for K-12 children.  I'm so glad to see that.  As an educator, I deeply appreciate We Need Diverse Books, a "non-profit and grassroots organization of children's book lovers that advocates essential changes in the publishing industry to produce and promote literature that reflects and honors the lives of all young people."  Representation is so important.

We adults need to "walk the walk" and not just "talk the talk" when it comes to reading diverse books.  No matter what genre you prefer, there are plenty of diverse books to chose from.  All three of my current reads are books by Black authors.  They fall into three different genres - nonfiction/history, science fiction, and autobiography.  I appreciate my reading friends and my book club, as well as my local library and the internet, for introducing me to a variety of diverse authors with whom I was not familiar, including but not limited to: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Viet Thanh Nguyen, Imbolo Mbue, Roxane Gay, Celeste Ng, Tracy K. Smith, Linda Hogan, Lisa Ko, and more...

*****

Currently reading, nonfiction - The Warmth of Other Suns: The Epic Story of America's Great Migration by Isabel Wilkerson

Currently reading, fiction - Kindred by Octavia Butler

Currently listening, audiobook - Becoming by Michelle Obama

Solitude and muddy forest paths

I seek refuge in solitude,
to rediscover myself
on muddy forest paths.
breathing deep the damp air
standing firm and still
like the trees surrounding me.
a chipmunk skitters past
a mosquito lands on my phone
as I jot down these words.

My feet fall on
decomposing leaves
and exposed tree roots.
I walk through
unseen spider webs
that tickle me and
acknowledge me
as the first traveler
on this path today.

I seek solitude, but
I am not alone.
the persistent chatter of
bird voices that range
from adamant to meek.
a softball game from
a more civilized
area of this park
the crack of a bat
and the players calling
"you got this!"
"go deep!"
I gather those messages
for myself as well.

I approach a sign
the illustration of two figures
with backpacks and walking sticks
and a large arrow indicating a path.
not three feet beyond which
a large tree has fallen
and blocks the way.
I accept the invitation and
the challenge, climbing
over the tree trunk
and continuing on.

Intermittent wildflowers
dot the forest with bursts
of purple and yellow.
but today I revel in
the lifeblood of the forest -
the endless swaths
of green and brown.

Leaving the forested path
for park and pavement,
I spot someone's
backyard rooster ambling near
a parking space.  He has
flown the coop, perhaps
seeking solitude and refuge,
the same as me.

The drizzle begins just as
I arrive at my car.
my frizzy hair and
damp forehead are
evidence of the humidity
I have absorbed.
I have also absorbed
the abundance of the forest,
the strength of the trees
the songs of the birds,
the invigorating smells of
new life and fresh rain.
The refuge I sought,
I have found.

Refuge was sought and found at Kletzsch Park, one of many gems in the Milwaukee County Parks. 

*****

You might enjoy my other nature poems:

Transformation

found sound: noises natural & not

cell phone/nature poem for the first day of spring

I pretend I am someplace else.

in-between

Reading notes: catching up & planning for summer

My last blog post was three months ago (We're Different. We're the Same.)  I'm hoping to both write and read more now that I'm on summer break.  My last reading notes were posted on August 1, 2018.  That's almost a year's worth of reading to cover, so I'm just listing the books under categories with a few notes here and there.  Maybe you'll find something to add to your summer reading list:

the last four books I read

 Book obsessions and binge-reading

During my breaks from school, I tended toward old favorites and "comfort" reads.  I don't watch much television, so instead of "binge-watching," I binge-read.  Over winter break, I reread Jane Austen's novels.  Over spring break, during which I also happened to be very sick, I reread North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell.  (And watched the BBC miniseries adaptation of North and South twice on Netflix.)  Continuing my obsessions with Austen and Gaskell, I read a number of retellings or fan fiction throughout the spring   

Northager Abbey, Persuasion, Emma, Mansfield Park, Sense and Sensibility, and Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (rereads)

North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell (reread)

Unmarriageable (Pride and Prejudice in Pakistan) by Soniah Kamal

Pride by Ibi Zoboi  (a modern day Pride and Prejudice remix set in Brooklyn)

No Such Thing As Luck: A North and South Variation by Nicole Clarkson (fan fiction)

Fiction (with a few notes on the books I read most recently)

Once Upon a River by Diana Setterfield:  This story - part historical fiction, part fairy tale, part mystery - develops slowly and meanders, like the titular river.  I was drawn in by the fascinating characters, the historical elements, the river, and the focus on stories and storytelling.

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller:  I've always been a fan of Greek mythology.  This is a beautifully-written retelling that focuses on the relationship between Achilles and Patroclus. 

Solar Storms by Linda Hogan  (book club):  I appreciate book club for introducing me to books I may never otherwise read.  This is a lyrical coming-of-age story and a fascinating (and often heart-breaking) look at Native American culture and history

The Leavers by Lisa Ko  (book club):  Highly-recommended!  Identity, belonging, borders...topics at the forefront of current events.  This is a compelling and sometimes heartbreaking/sometimes hopeful story about an undocumented Chinese immigrant and her son.

Nothing to Lose: Stories by Kim Suhr:  Intriguing short stories with a local/regional flair.  Suhr is the Director of Red Oak Writing, a great resource for local writers.  You can read more about her and the book here.   

In a Dark, Dark Wood by Ruth Ware

Like Water for Chocolate by Laura Esquivel  (book club; reread)

Flight Behavior by Barbara Kingsolver  (book club; reread)

Mrs. Lincoln's Dressmaker by Jennifer Chiaverini

A Constellation of Vital Phenomena by Anthony Marra

Before We Were Yours by Lisa Wingate

Almost Maine by John Cariani

Youth & young adult literature

All of these are really good reads that deal with important topics.  I recommend them all, but my favorites from this list are the two novels by Sharon Draper. 

Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds:  A novel in verse about gun violence; packs a powerful punch.

Harbor Me by Jacqueline Woodson

On the Come Up by Angie Thomas:  The second novel from the author of The Hate U Give.

Copper Sun by Sharon Draper

Out of My Mind by Sharon Draper

Nonfiction

Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World by Cal Newport:  A good read from Newport.  I wrote about his book Deep Work in a previous post.

Lost Cat: A True Story of Love, Desperation, and GPS Technology by Caroline Paul:  A very fun story with great illustrations!

The Color of Law: A Forgotten History of How Our Government Segregated America by Richard Rothstein:  I read this for a discussion group.  It's infuriating how entrenched racist government policies have been even in recent history.  A good companion to Evicted by Matthew Desmond.  See more about Evicted in this post.

Not Always Happy: An Unusual Parenting Journey by Kari Wagner-Peck:  A moving and inspiring memoir about adopting a child with Down syndrome and advocating for him within a frustrating education system.  Might be of particular interest to parents of children with special needs and educators.

*****

Member of my household:  "You can't just read all summer."
Me:  "Oh yes I can." (especially if I'm sitting outside in the sun)

current TBR pile with four more books on hold at the library

We're different. We're the same.

I saw this sign when I walked into the library yesterday.  I was bogged down with a couple dozen books in canvas bags, and I quickly headed to the return slot to unload them.  Then, after checking out another couple dozen books for my classroom, I made a beeline for door.  I was ready to get home and enjoy my Saturday.  Maybe read a (non-picture) book?  Maybe take a walk and enjoy the sunshine and (finally) milder temperatures? 

I stopped myself.  It’s the least I can do.  The very least.  I headed to the community room where the group sponsoring this event had set up information tables and displays about Islam.  They offered pamphlets, books, and food.  As I read the displays, a man approached and asked if I had any questions.  We conversed about some of the information on the signs, and then I continued on my own.  As I finished circling around the displays, he encouraged me to sample some food.  He helped me get a plate of falafel balls, hummus, and pita bread.  I sat down at a table and unloaded my bags on the floor.  We chatted a bit more about our families and jobs.  I told him I'm a teacher, and he mentioned that his wife was the administrator of a school.  He waved her over.  She sat down with me.  “You look familiar,” she said.  We soon discovered not only that we both homeschooled our children for many years, but also that we attended the same homeschool group for a time.  We marveled at the smallness of the world. 

Nobody had mentioned Christchurch yet, but it was there with us in the room.  I don’t know if this event was planned previously or was put together in response to the tragedy in New Zealand.  I didn’t ask.  But I felt the need to say something.  When the conversation lulled, I tried, “It’s terrible what happened.  Such a tragedy.  I’m so sorry for your community and for the world.  It’s so horrible.  There are no words.”  She nodded and said she still couldn’t believe it had happened, so many dead.  We sat silently for a while, filled with emotion.  Then she picked up the conversation again.  Both of us had returned to work full-time in the last couple of years, and we discussed the struggles of balancing family and work.  We talked about schools and education, about our kids in high school and college.  Finally we parted by sharing our names and a warm handshake. 

I returned to my car, thoughtful, reminded of how similar we are in so many ways.  There was a Sesame Street book called We’re Different, We’re the Same that I used to read to my children when they were little.  Yes, we’re different.  Yes, we’re the same.  It’s hard to know exactly what to do in the face of such hatred as manifested itself in the massacre in New Zealand.   Certainly we can advocate and rally and speak up to hatred.  We can vote and be politically active in other ways.  But I also think we can be more intentional about sitting with each other.  My experience yesterday definitely reminded me that I need to do more of this.  Let’s be more present to those who are different or who we think are different from us in some way.  Let's constantly remind ourselves of our common humanity.  Let's remember - we’re different, AND we’re the same.